Confussions Of A Screwy Mind
I lack in character judgement. My reaction is more logic based and preprogrammed to actions than feelings. I have checked.. and I am insensitive to emotions and feelings around me. I build a wall around myself though. Why do I do that? hmm... I think there's a few reasons. Although I wouldn't mind it if some of you, whomever you are, care to share your opinions of what they are, or what kind of person I am. I just need to have some reflection of myself from other people. I need to change, you see. I've got things about me that is not in my or others best interest. I would like to clear out the cobwebs of issues in my head. tackle the problems and solving them. There was once a time i could finish a slew of assignments/homework like nobody's business. Then I grew 'fat' and slow... I can't damn well finish a sentence properly. Self reflection is great and all.. but I don't have a clue what the surrounding thinks of me, or how they react with me and near me. I know I piss off a few guys the minute I'm in their vicinity. That includes you apek... Then, there's the few that get meluat with me, also a large and popular group. And I guess by far, the biggest group, is the one that's indifferent to me. but in whatever group you are. If you have a comment about me that needs to be shared, by all means.. please share them.
On the whole, I've got issues that I want to tackle. I sure appreciate some input. And what I want in the end is to be a better person. This time around though, I want to be a better person, specifically to one lady. I want to make her love me more than she ever had. And I know it's no walk in the park.
CiAO!
On the whole, I've got issues that I want to tackle. I sure appreciate some input. And what I want in the end is to be a better person. This time around though, I want to be a better person, specifically to one lady. I want to make her love me more than she ever had. And I know it's no walk in the park.
CiAO!
posted by Cold at 8/06/2004 04:21:00 PM
2 Comments:
lets start with deleting this one particular blog that i hate...well i dont really hate it...i just feel disturbed by it and somehow it hurts me in a way. it's the one entitled 'I Love Parveen'.
i totally respect yr thoughts and writings but i cant live with that one particular blog. call it jealousy or whatever f**k but i just cant stand it and u said it yrself..it wasnt love. it was merely...an infatuation for superficiality.
and pls dont have so low of an opinion about yrself otherwise u'll lose it all sweetheart. you shouldnt say u spew garbage out of yr fingers..or whatnot. i think u can be eloquent when u want to..when yr mood suits u right.
here's a bit something for u:
I want a red dress.
I want it flimsy and cheap,
I want it too tight, I want to wear it
until someone tears it off me.
I want it sleeveless and backless,
this dress, so no one has to guess
what's underneath. I want to walk down
the street past Thrifty's and the hardware store
with all those keys glittering in the window,
past Mr. and Mrs. Wong selling day-old
donuts in their café, past the Guerra brothers
slinging pigs from the truck and onto the dolly,
hoisting the slick snouts over their shoulders.
I want to walk like I'm the only
woman on earth and I can have my pick.
I want that red dress bad.
I want it to confirm
your worst fears about me,
to show you how little I care about you
or anything except what
I want. When I find it, I'll pull that garment
from its hanger like I'm choosing a body
to carry me into this world, through
the birth-cries and the love-cries too,
and I'll wear it like bones, like skin,
it'll be the goddamned
dress they bury me in.
done. And I'll change it once I've understood myself better. I promise.
Post a Comment
<< Home