BFG vs JGG -> Big Friendly Giant vs Jolly Green Giant

I consider myself of certain characteristics. Physically, I am big. Relatively bigger than most adult male Malays. And another I do add a touch of oafiness and clumsiness with every stride. It gives myself an added character. As much as I am a big clumsy person, with a somewhat tough exterior and lacking in grace, I do own something soft inside.
I am tough on the outside. I've got a very high pain threshold. I can take a beating with the best of them. I even enjoy the "feeling" sometimes, because it's good to know that you are still human. Tapikan.. because I am still human, I've got my weak spot too. A tough exterior leaves me with a soft heart. One that could be bruised and hurt easily. And to my unfortunate luck. It was hurt and bruised, slowly but surely. Now it's worn down. I can imagine my heart looking like an old boot. Tough, but breaking at the seams, and cracks here and there.

Dulu I had a brief episode of having a cold heart. I tried to be an emotionless robot. I wanted to take out the pain equation out of my system. Tapi benda tu tak bleh. Memang tak bleh punya. Sebab, once you do that. Then you notice that you are alone. Even when there are people around you, you are still alone. Because you refuse to accept them into your cold heart. But if bad things happen. It didn't hurt so much. But it backfired, because pain was still a feeling you can't shake off. It's like hot plasma that can easily melt the exteriors of your heart and burn you right to the core.

Apa apa jadi pun, pain is a part of life you have to accept. I have learned to understand my pain and hurt and accept them. It still hurts, it still wears down your insides, but at least now I know how to heal myself. What I need now is time to heal myself. I won't run away. I won't let rage control me. I won't bury myself in work. I'm just gonna take it easy, calm down, reflect on things and take time to heal my wounded heart.